I am phobic when it comes to talking about money. Phobic! It didn't occur to me until yesterday when I realized a buncha things that I hadn't done regarding my finances. I always feel like I don't have enough money to do what is necessary to live comfortably.
Crazy huh? I would say I am crazy. But, how many people feel this way and never say anything about it. (Now, that's crazy...to hold all this stuff in). Actually, talking about it on this blog makes me feel like I'm going to vomit. What is up with that? ( I guess that's why people never say it out loud! That's what makes for the fake, pretentious society we live in. People hidin' stuff.)
My heart beats fast, I'm starting to hyperventilate and I feel nauseated. I have a headache now. I know though that the only way to get rid if your fears is to look them straight in the eye. And I'm staring this sucker down. So, what do I do know.
I looked up my credit report yesterday and it is bad. Not as bad as I thought it was but bad enough. I never understood the importance of financial clout. I understand it now but how do I fix a financial situation that's as broken as mine? Not only am I living paycheck to paycheck...but I'm living paycheck to paycheck.
I sometimes wonder what the merit of airing all of my dirty laundry on a blog is? Maybe there is no merit. But, it is cathartic.
I took a nap this morning and woke up feeling oh! so peaceful. I didn't really intend to go to sleep, I just wanted to relax for a few minutes after my son got on the school bus.
Maybe one day I will find my niche and write about things that matter to everyone else. I doubt it. I like writing what matters to me. It has taken a long time for me to get to this point. Blogging is a great forum to just say stuff on.
So I'm just sayin'....
Crazy huh? I would say I am crazy. But, how many people feel this way and never say anything about it. (Now, that's crazy...to hold all this stuff in). Actually, talking about it on this blog makes me feel like I'm going to vomit. What is up with that? ( I guess that's why people never say it out loud! That's what makes for the fake, pretentious society we live in. People hidin' stuff.)
My heart beats fast, I'm starting to hyperventilate and I feel nauseated. I have a headache now. I know though that the only way to get rid if your fears is to look them straight in the eye. And I'm staring this sucker down. So, what do I do know.
I looked up my credit report yesterday and it is bad. Not as bad as I thought it was but bad enough. I never understood the importance of financial clout. I understand it now but how do I fix a financial situation that's as broken as mine? Not only am I living paycheck to paycheck...but I'm living paycheck to paycheck.
I sometimes wonder what the merit of airing all of my dirty laundry on a blog is? Maybe there is no merit. But, it is cathartic.
I took a nap this morning and woke up feeling oh! so peaceful. I didn't really intend to go to sleep, I just wanted to relax for a few minutes after my son got on the school bus.
Maybe one day I will find my niche and write about things that matter to everyone else. I doubt it. I like writing what matters to me. It has taken a long time for me to get to this point. Blogging is a great forum to just say stuff on.
So I'm just sayin'....
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