Last night I had a dream that I was taking care of my two exes or that they were still in this old apartment. First, I had a dream that I was taking care of some prisoneer, transporting him here there, feeding him, then I was in a car where locusts were getting in from a swarm. Then somehow, my first husband comes to visit and doesn't leave. Everytime I see him, he has his head under the covers. My second husband is still the casanova that he's always been and he has some little chippy as his girlfriend. He's feeding her and my youngest who is still a baby in this dream is hungry. I tell my second ex this and she pipes up and I tell her to mind her own business, Joe tells her it would be best if she leaves for now. I then go to talk to my first ex to ask him when he is going to leave and he says that he is staying so that he can finish his MD. I become livid and say to him...I thought you had your MD. He never answers. In the meantime I go back to the second ex and he's feeding some young woman in the kitchen. She's young. Kind of attractive, so I say to my ex, the baby doesn't have any food. She pipes up and answers. I tell her I'm not talking to her...and he tells her to leave.
That's not all of the dream but that's all that I care to discuss... I end up going into a rage, throwing a frying pan at ex number two, which hits the baby. Then, the fight continues with both exes and I end up pulling a pseudo-seizure which I wake up performing with my head hanging off of the bed.
I need a long break from work. I don't know how I'm going to get it but the isssues, that hinder me in life are so well hidden in my compulsion to stay on the run. No wonder I went into a slump before vacation and found myself extremely anxious at the beginning of my time off.
I need some time.... I'm tired and feeling burnt out. I need time to just sit, think and write.
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